UNION, KENT. -- Cassandra, a mother of three boys, will give birth to her first daughter on Thursday when doctors induce her into labor, the 32-year-old Michigan native announced today.
Cassandra, who has been pregnant for approximately nine months, said she is excited to give birth, mostly though, "just to have it over with."
"After this, my obligation as a walking baby factory will be over," she said. "Also, I'm sure I will love my new daughter with all my heart."
The family told other family members weeks ago that they planned to name the daughter, who will turn 1 on Nov. 1, 2008, Maisy. A middle name has either not been decided, not been announced or forgotten by this author.
Meanwhile, Adam recently purchased the new operating system from Apple, which is called OS X Leopard. He said he is pleased, but in no way will he consider naming his new daughter Maisy Leopard.
"Maybe if it was a boy, and Steve Jobs offered me a free iMac," Adam said. "But until that happens, I'm totally naming my soon-to-be daughter Maisy."
Also today, grandmothers Mary and Rhonda -- who are the mothers of Cassandra and Adam, respectively -- reportedly screamed "hot damn" after hearing the news.
Each also say this granddaughter will be "the most precious, beautiful, angelic, cute" girl ever created by human biology, though it is not clear if there is a basis for such a statement, or if such as statement could ever be proven false or true.
"I just know it, know it, know it," Mary was heard saying.
"It's true, she is going to be the best granddaughter ever created," Rhonda said.
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6 comments:
I agree with the Grandparents that baby Maisy will be
"the most precious, beautiful, angelic, cute" girl ever created by human biology. She'll look just like her mommy. Look at those Herman boys.... they are soooo cute! Good luck Cassandra, you'll be in our prayers and we LOVE you more than pigs love slop, and they LOVE slop. -KMT
Wow, I didn't know I said all those things! :)
But, I do know she will be darling, because she will be all of ours to love and cherish.
no longer a baby factory.... ah nice nice words.
Well if Cassandra is giving up the reins as a baby factory, I guess I will have to start mine back up again....Oh I forgot the machinery for the factory was thrown out.
Is it just me or do none of the girls,except maybe Aunt Liz, understand that this was satire. It must take a little testosterone to be able to read at that level.
Daniel, my son, this is Mary/your mom.
Don't you know that even your mamma has a pinch of humor, and apparently, a bunch of testosterone?
In other words, I got the satire, and, being the funny girl I am, even responded, in a Mary fashion. :) I'm one cool chick.
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